A Question of Faith?

As an artist I am often faced with the dilemma of believing in what is factual knowledge and what is belief beyond proof, often called faith. Recently the comedian Bill Mahr said "Faith is the suspension of critical thinking." It didn't sound like a joke to me, instead it struck a cord of truth and I began to reexamine some beliefs I simply held in faith.

As I get older questions about death and after-life begin to loom with more relivence then in youth. I know myself to be a logical person with a good mind and I can stubbornly hold to a position of reason based on experience and factual knowledge. I am not a psychologist nor an overly religious person, but I have studied much about the connection of the mind, body and soul(spirit).

I know for example that the ego is not the soul but rather a necessary product of the self-aware little mind. It is that part of us that needs what we do not have, that drives us to achieve more and more and to strive for gains in the social game of life, it is the "separator". The ego being self driven sees what it lacks and wants it. Once it gains it's desire it resets it's goals on the next need. This is a cycle of fulfillment and emptiness that has no end. It is a necessary part of our survival because of the way we live in the physical world we find ourselves in.

On the other hand the soul is our source of connection to each other and all else, it is the "unifier" from which our desire to love flows. The soul holds the view of the big mind and is our emotional compass to knowing right from wrong. We are a duality of ego centered body and lofted soul consciousness. Now these are my thoughts of reason based on what I have learned from studied scholars and scientists. I do not profess to have come to this conclusion based solely on my own extensive research. So with this as a premise here are the questions.

If the ego is a product of our mind-body and it's fulfillment is driven by need, then how is it possible for it to be part of the soul in death? If it is not then logic follows there is no self-awareness in the afterlife, right? Which also drives the question of any afterlife at all?

So death is the end of mind-body and the release of spirit back to the source of all things. How can there be  judgment of an ego-less spirit? Shouldn't it then follow that there is no heaven or self-aware place for our ego's to cary on beyond death?

It is my supposition that there is not a white bearded deity out there somewhere sitting on a thrown of judgment that will punish us with unspeakable acts of cruelty if we have not followed religious doctrine. It is however true that our acts of good and evil are watched by ourselves and others and we reap what we sow, but it is while we are in life that it applies. We need to come to terms with how we live. Is it in the love of the big mind spirit or in the need of a small minded ego? Each of us makes these choices every day sometimes we are good and sometimes we are not. Awareness of your mindset will determine the outcome of your choice. All we can do is to try to be awake and aware of our best self so that the ramifications of our actions affect not only ourselves, but touch everyone in our personal universe - that we can inspire or disappoint or just coast in neutral. (thank you Shari for the last line)